Homeschooling Discernment Series: Words of encouragement

It's been a while since I posted about homeschooling here (though I have some GREAT new ideas and thoughts thanks to visiting with a local homeschool family recently), but I wanted to post some encouraging words I received from one of my dearest friends. She and I worked together at a Girl Scout camp for a few years after high school and she was one of my bridesmaids-- and I was her Confirmation sponsor when she became Catholic!

She sent me an e-mail (confessing her lack of commenting-- for shame!) that gave me a lot of encouragement about thinking of homeschooling just one day and year at a time.

Okay, so I read your blog all the time and LOVE it, but am way to shy to comment it on it (I know, what kind of friend am I?).  So, I just had to give you my two cents from a working mom on homeschooling.  Hands down I think you should do it.  If for no other reason then because if you don't you will always wonder.  While you're working, you'll wish you were home with your kids (partly grass is greener syndrome).  Anytime something "bad" happened in school you will think to yourself "If only I homeschooled..."  and you will always wonder if you made the right decision. HOWEVER, if you homeschool and you love it and it's wonderful then great!  You made the right decision.  If you homeschool and it doesn't work out, no harm done, at least you know.  But take it from me, the thought will always be in the back of your mind and you'll always wonder "what if..."

Also, you are spot on.  The decision is not permanent.  I know a parent who homeschooled her kids until one son was in third grade and then enrolled him in public school when he was having trouble with his reading.  I also know another family (who has 8 kids) and the mom switches back and forth between homeschooling and public school and all of the kids are very well adjusted! They're all great kids!

So, not that you asked for it, but I just had to tell you I think you should go for it!

Thanks, friend! Such great advice and thoughts... I love you!

Homeschooling discernment series: Guest post numero dos

Side note: For some insane/inane reason, my blog is still not updating in anyone's feed in a timely fashion. My kitchen blog does fine in this area, as does my private blog when I take it public to test it.
 

The best solution I have found for this problem is: If you have me listed in your blog roll, or if you follow some other way and have to enter my blog address, add this one-- http://cheerfullychaotic.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default?alt=rss
 

For some reason this makes my new posts appear instantly. I don't understand the problem but know that this is at least a temporary solution.Thank you to all of the technie nerds geniuses who have e-mailed and tried to help me with this.

Now... on to the real reason you're reading this post...

Yesterday I wrote an introduction to Lisa, from The Little House that Grew, and explained what drew me to her blog and led me to shamelessly beg nicely ask her to write a guest post here. 

And now, without further ado... here is the first part of Lisa's guest post (including her preface from yesterday)! 

I happen to be a freshman when it comes to home schooling. In other words, I am still wet behind the ears working my way through this choice. In some ways that is an advantage when talking with young moms who are discerning home schooling. I was just there. I was them, and in some ways I still am them. Even after 5 years of home schooling I have doubts, worries and regret.

Let me just state, before we go any further, I am a homeschooler….not an ANTI-SCHOOLER. And there is a difference in my opinion. I don’t think my children will become corrupt if they associate with or enter a “school.” I don‘t hate school. I wish it were that simple. But just like with all families…there is more to the story than that.

Mine started when I was in Alaska, a young mom to 2 little girls, and I met 2 Catholic home schooling moms. Upon meeting their families I was impressed. I just liked what I saw. The kids were kind. They were respectful. They spoke while looking at you. They prayed with their parents at supper. They read…for FUN!!

But this is not what you want to hear. If you are considering home schooling than you too have met families like this. You too are intrigued by what you see in these families.

I started asking them questions. A lot of questions. How do you do this? How do you do that? And more importantly …WHY?…that was my biggest question. And from there I began to develop my own how’s and why’s. But as time has gone on, I have found that my why’s have changed, and so have I. And the biggest problem I have in explaining my reasons for home schooling is there are so many different connected, yet unrelated reasons why I started, why I still do it, and why I plan to continue. 

Mine is just one story, my story, and nobody but me and God will ever know the whole thing. But let me tell you the first part.

All Things Start From Faith:

But first, some background…

I am what you would call a revert. I was born and raised Catholic, but never developed a faith of my own. After getting married and having children I still was pretty “faithless.” I had a desire to know God but I never really knew how or where to meet Him. I knew how to go through the motions of being Catholic, but never was one at heart. And that story began changing after I met the above-mentioned moms. These two women were strong practicing Catholic wives and home schooling mothers. They wove their love for the Lord into their every moment, seamlessly. I was touched. I wanted to be like them. I wanted to love God with my daily actions. During this time I could not learn enough. I was inhaling books on the faith and praying like crazy. I was feeling God’s love in every area of my life. I started buying all sorts of kids Catholic stuff. Reading to the girls, teaching them the basics of our faith. All the while I was learning right alone side them. I loved it.

My girls were very young so home schooling was just a twinkle in the future. But I felt my heart being pulled that way. I could not help but think, “I could learn along side them.” And the idea of that was intriguing. Sure I had all the same thoughts you have, is this OK for them? Are they going to hate me for missing Prom? What will everyone think of me? Will my kids be weird? Do I have to start wearing jean jumpers ? You know, all those very rational things that rush through your head when you realize that God may be asking you to do something He wants of you.

Meanwhile, my 4 year old daughter was (is) a high maintenance kid (her fault or mine???). She is not the affectionate type. I was having a hard time relating with her. I loved her and wanted to show my love to her but we were just “at” each other. I was reading all sorts of parenting books and trying some of the techniques but I was also very pregnant again right after delivering a baby at 20 weeks, and keeping up with my other 2 year old little girl. So needless to say things were a bit rocky between us.

During this time my friend happen to give me the book Teach Your Child To Read in 100 Easy Lessons. She told me that was how she taught all 4 of her kids to read and she loved it. I gladly accepted the book and immediately liked the Direct Instruction approach. I had worked with Direct Instruction in a private school I worked at in California. Direct Instruction is a script format that the teacher and the student follow. I saw the success this type of instruction had on those students and thought I would give it a shot. And why not, 20 minutes a day was doable. I was not officially home schooling, just preparing my oldest for kindergarten.

Over the next few weeks I informally began using the book. I would pull Emily’s chair really close to mine. I would tickle her back, play with her hair and just be close to her. We would spend about 15 minutes a day doing this. I would always encourage her progress and celebrate her successes. After a while I noticed she wanted to do more and more. Not that she loved doing the lessons, but she loved being with me. She did not want our time to end. I was noticing a difference in her altogether. She was more lovable, more affectionate. Could this all be because of that 15 minutes a day I was spending with her doing “school”? It was! She and I became different people from that moment forward. I saw the power I had in this relationship and how it could be used for the good of both of us. I became a more aware, present mom once I realized the impact all my interactions with her had.

My heart was really feeling pulled to home schooling. And I thought that was what God wanted. But I began to wonder after I had my 3rd baby and 3 months later got pregnant again with #4. How in the world could I do this? And were my reasons for wanting to home school strong enough? Was it enough to just want to learn and live your Faith with your kids? Couldn’t I do that while they were home after a day at school? I prayed and prayed…and wound up enrolling Emily in Catholic School in Alabama which is where we were moving 3 weeks before school started and 6 weeks after my 4th child was born. I was convinced that was what God wanted…or was it?

And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen-- the first post from Lisa at The Little House that Grew!

Homeschooling guest post TOMORROW!

I am very excited to have a homeschooling guest post tomorrow from a wonderful Catholic blogger whom I recently found, Lisa, from The Little House that Grew. I e-mailed and asked her if she'd be interested in doing a guest post here... and if she would like to move to Texas and live next-door so we could drink coffee together every morning and talk about our school plans.

I'm not kidding-- I figured it was worth a shot. She hasn't said no to that thus far, so I'm not writing it off just yet.

I knew that I would love Lisa when I came across THIS post. It's the same pie I made last Thanksgiving at the ranch! Granted, I modified it into a gluten-free recipe for my MIL, but it was amazing either way. I even had to call my mom for the exact recipe, since I'd left my Southern Living at home. My theory about Lisa was that anyone who 1) makes Pioneer Woman recipes as much as I do, 2) loves reading Clover Lane, 3) bakes Southern Living pies with blogging friends, 4) and uses a D-90 Nikon to takes photos is my kind of gal. Plus, it makes me laugh when people have the same name as me. I think it looks funny to type, "Dear Lisa" and then sign it with "Lisa."

Lisa e-mailed me back almost immediately and was sweet enough to say that, YES, she could do a post for me! I sent her a zillion questions, and she got to work writing about how she and her husband decided that homeschooling is for them now.

Here's the intro to Lisa's homeschooling story:

I happen to be a freshman when it comes to home schooling. In other words, I am still wet behind the ears working my way through this choice. In some ways that is an advantage when talking with young moms who are discerning home schooling. I was just there. I was them, .and in some ways I still am them. Even after 5 years of home schooling I have doubts, worries and regret.

Let me just state, before we go any further, I am a homeschooler….not an ANTI-SCHOOLER. And there is a difference in my opinion. I don’t think my children will become corrupt if they associate with or enter a “school.” I don‘t hate school. I wish it were that simple. But just like with all families… there is more to the story than that.

Mine started when I was in Alaska, a young mom to 2 little girls, and I met 2 Catholic home schooling moms. Upon meeting their families I was impressed. I just liked what I saw. The kids were kind. They were respectful. They spoke while looking at you. They prayed with their parents at supper. They read… for FUN!!

But this is not what you want to hear. If you are considering home schooling than you too have met families like this. You too are intrigued by what you see in these families. 

I started asking them questions. A lot of questions. How do you do this? How do you do that? And more importantly …WHY?…that was my biggest question. And from there I began to develop my own how’s and why’s. But as time has gone on, I have found that my why’s have changed, and so have I. And the biggest problem I have in explaining my reasons for home schooling is there are so many different connected, yet unrelated reasons why I started, why I still do it, and why I plan to continue. Mine is just one story, my story, and nobody but me and God will ever know the whole thing.  But let me tell you the first part...

You'll have to wait until tomorrow for the first part! (Or you can check it out on her blog... but come back tomorrow, anyway)  

Also, if you haven't already, be sure to "follow" Lisa's blog... and my own. :-)

You'll (hopefully!) be hearing more from Lisa in future guest posts about the homeschooling curriculum she uses, and how she manages to do this with little ones around!

Thanks, Lisa!

Homeschooling Discernment Series: Academics and Catholic curricula, Part One

As a former Catholic school English teacher, I am definitely interested in the academic success of homeschooled students, in addition to recognizing the other benefits that homeschooling offers to children (doing fractions while in pajamas and baking muffins, anyone? And definitely no gangs in the household, unless my kids ally themselves with the cat and dogs...).

Thus, a 2004 article published in The Journal of College Admission that discussed how well homeschooled students did in college definitely caught my attention. In it, the author, a college recruiter/admissions officer, was pleasantly surprised to discover the success of these students both on standardized testing and on actual college campuses. He says that

Research showed that our homeschooled students had above-average SAT and ACT scores (1210 and 29 respectively). They also performed better academically. They had a combined cumulative grade point average of 3.47, compared to the 2.91 shared by the general student population. Through semi-structured interviews, I found they were also doing well socially.

These students were well prepared for college by their homeschooling experience. 

Sounds pretty nice, huh?!

CBS's Moneywatch.com also ran an article this summer entitled "Can Homeschoolers Do Well in College?" The verdict? Yes, they can! (I apologize for the slight reference to... you know... Bob the Builder... and that other guy) And take a look at these two statistics-- I found them the most interesting and inspiring, given that one could argue that the homeschooling advantage would fade away once the student completed his or her first year of college.

The GPA advantage was still present when homeschoolers were college seniors. Their average GPA was 3.46 versus 3.16 for other seniors. 

Homeschool students graduated from college at a higher rate (66.7%) than their peers (57.5%).

These academic statistics appear to support the idea that parents may be  the best teachers of their children, at least from an academic standpoint.

On a different topic, I've started looking into some Catholic homeschool programs. The ones I've found so far, in alphabetical order, include:

Some Catholic homeschool programs, in alphabetical order:

Angelicum Academy

Catholic Heritage

Kolbe Academy

Little Saints Catholic Preschool

Mater Amabilis

Mother of Divine Grace School

Our Lady of the Rosary School

Our Lady of Victory School

Regina Coeli Academy

Seton Home Study School

St. Thomas Aquinas Academy 

I've made a few notes on some of the programs, and will hopefully find time for the remainder of them for the next Wednesday or two.
 
Mater Amabilis- Per their website, Mater Amabilis is "a Charlotte Mason style curriculum for Catholics in the 21st century." The curriculum is free, so long as it is being used for personal use and not for profit. I see two HUGE upsides to this site: 1) for those who are concerned about tuition costs for homeschooling, this is potentially a saving grace and 2) it is a great resource for parents who want to pull ideas from a variety of sources, or test out different curricula. The program appears to be still in development, so I don't quite see it being used as a full-time "school."

One thing I love about homeschooling is how efficient it is, time-wise, when compared with public/private schools: the intro page for Mater Amabilis says that Levels 1 and 2 (K-5) only take up to 2 1/2 hours per day, using a 36-week schooling plan!

Our Lady of the Rosary School- I should have taken the Home Economics elective offered through this school... I could have made a chasuble in addition to the blue dress! The program requires parents to return all books and lesson plans at the end of the school year, or until the youngest child has used them. I understand their logic in attempting to keep costs down, but I'm not a fan of not keeping the books and lesson plans, in principle.

Pre-K- $99
Kindergarten- $225
Grades 1-12- $529

There is also a $20/child cash discount, and a $20/child (2 kids) discount, $40/child (3 kids) discount, and $60/child (4+ kids) discount for families with students grades 1-12.

On top of this is the cost of the curriculum (prices vary based upon whether or not you already have the books and whether or not you want the grading service).

Our Lady of Victory School

It is, by their assertion, the oldest Catholic homestudy program in the United States. It only supports the Latin Tridentine Mass. The school is accredited by the National Association of Private Catholic & Independent Schools. I need to look more into this one, and check out their fees.

Seton Home Study School- Seton is fully-accredited by SACS. I LOVE the sample lesson plans on this site-- they've helped me to understand how exactly homeschooling works as a practical matter. For instance, check out the lesson plans for Kindergarten P.E. and 1st grade Math. These aren't scary at all! I can visualize myself doing these things with C in the next few years and not going crazy. And, as I peeked ahead to future grades, I can see how feasible it is to do work with younger children (the Kindergarten P.E. stuff, for instance) while the older children are reading or doing Math work. Then, the younger children can do their coloring of numbers or whatever their Math lesson of the day is while I would work with the older children. On a slight negative note, I'm wondering about the whole Evolution Hoax CD that 9th graders buy... on a personal level, I've never had an issue with evolution coexisting peacefully with the creation story and consider them complimentary, not contradictory. I'm under the impression that Catholicism has no issue with this, either. Help, anyone??

Seton's website has a handy calculator to help estimate costs-- though we only have two children now, I know the basic timeline we're hoping for with a future child(ren) and can thus calculate a bit further into the future. Not including the $30 new family fee, the breakdown looks like this:
$200 Kindergarten
$490* per child, grades 1-12

*There is a $50 price break for 2 children, a $100 price break for 3 children, and other price breaks for more children (I didn't keep doing the math)

Students can also enroll in one or more academic courses without actually being fully enrolled in the Seton program. I'm not entirely sure exactly how this works, but it sounds like a nice option for those who want to pick and choose various curricula.

And have I mentioned how much I love the word curricula? I think it looks like Dracula, which amuses me to no end.

On another note (given that it's my note, it is likely off-key), C's Mother's Day Out program (ok, they're calling it a "preschool" now, but I use it as an MDO... I'm supposed to be finishing my thesis during the 9 hours of "free time" I have each week, but having a crawling infant has sidetracked that even further) uses the WEE Learn program. At first, I saw the $129 price tag for the 3 year old curriculum and thought, "No WAY am I paying that for a book!" Then I realized that 1 month of MDO tuition covers the book. Hmm. Basically, I'm using the MDO program as a sitter for C, though, so I'll justify it for at least a few more months. :-) It sure was great when I was pregnant with H because I scheduled my million appointments for one of the two MDO days each week. Anyway, my point is that I could just purchase the WEE Learn curriculum guide and do it at home, and perhaps with another local family or two! I LOVE the home(pre)schooling co-op that The Domestic Notebook does. It's such a great idea! (Seriously... is it possible for me to go an entire week without mentioning how much I love this site?)

Homeschooling Discernment Series: Fully-reversible schooling... and homeschool classrooms to die for!

** This post is shorter than I'd planned for this week-- we went out of town for the long weekend and then I spent the next night staying up with a very sad (and sick?) toddler and teething infant, so the editing that needed to get done of my full post wasn't happening last night. Here's the abbreviated version:

I touched on this idea last week, but one thing that eases my mind about homeschooling is that no matter what decision we make in the next few years, we can always, and easily, reverse the decision.

Example 1: Should we opt for homeschooling our daughter for Kindergarten and first grade, and then discover that it's not for us (or for her), we could send her to the local public school for second grade, and do likewise with my son, who would be entering Kindergarten.

Example 2: Same as Example 1, but with the modification of homeschooling our son for a few years (if we felt it was best for him) while our daughter went to public school (I'd include Catholic/private as an option here, but the distance to one from our home really precludes the idea), and seeing how that worked.

Example 3: Same as Example 1, but with the modification of reverting back to homeschooling once more if we were concerned with what our daughter was/wasn't learning or to what she was being exposed.

Homeschooling moms-- have you gone back-and-forth at all? Had different schooling plans for different children? Know families that have?

EDITED TO ADD: Perhpas the concept of homeschooling being fully-reversible is no surprise to many people, but for someone like me, who was worried that it was an all-or-nothing thing, it's reassuring to realize that, at any point, we can change our minds and change the way we educate our children. That's a selling point for my somewhat-hesitant husband.

As an added bonus, here are a few homeschool classrooms that have piqued my interest...

The Domestic Notebook- I love, love, LOVE how practical this room is, and I particularly like the emphasis on the table and chairs-- learning is literally the central focus in this room! The Notetaker has done a fantastic job (really, though, I can't think of a single post of hers where I don't think she's done a fantastic job at whatever she's done...) at integrating the three stages of childhood she's dealing with: a preschooler (the table, flashcards, and books), a toddler (puzzles, chalk, and letters), and an infant (an ottoman for nursing!). In the back of my mind I question how to balance multiple children and homeschooling, and this room answers that question!

A Holy Experience- The maps. Ahhh. The maps make me swoon like the heroine of a 17th-century British novel. And don't even get me started on the bookshelves and wooden caddy. They push me over the edge. Every time I look at this room, I want to be this woman's child/student. 

Less of Me~More of Him- This is what I picture when I think of the phrase "homeschool classroom," at least in the early years. It's colorful, and arranged roughly like a preschool classroom would be.

Granted, we have no "free" rooms in the house at the moment, should I want to mimic any of these. I think it may be time to think about adding on...

One last note: I used to think there was something odd about homeschooling, like the kids would be missing most of their teeth and the mothers would wear prairie dresses to the grocery store. Clearly, I was wayyyyyy off base. But then I came across a blog that kind of confirmed my fears. So, in order to proceed, I'm having to force that blog out of my mind. I even cleared my history so I wouldn't stumble upon it again unless it was purely accidental. Extreme, no?

Homeschooling Discernment Series: Fears and questions

Lisa's Top Homeschooling Fears:

1) I won't be able to cut it. Not in an academic-sense, but in terms of my personality. I'm afraid I'll get lazy, fall behind, ruin my children's lives, etc. I can have my house cleaned (nearly) perfectly and then, just two days later, have it look like a tornado hit. I can procrastinate with the best of them and I'm fearful that not only would I pass on poor time-management skills to my children, but they would never have a chance to learn better ones from other teachers.

This, however, didn't worry me when I taught high school. I knew what had to be done in terms of assignments and deadlines, and I did it. Also, whether or not I teach the kids their regular schooling at home or not, it's still up to me and M to help them to be more organized, conscientious people. Plus, would a job outside the home PLUS a family really make me get in gear? I doubt it. This is another area I see that I need to improve in now, before C reaches Kindergarten age... I need to prove to myself that I can organize our lives better and create more peace at home.

* Any other non-Type-A moms out there with thoughts on this? If I were Type-A, this would be a no-brainer, in terms of whether or not I could keep our home and school lives organized.

2) I won't be able to cut it. This time from an academic perspective. What about dissection? And is dissection even necessary? Who decides what's necessary? Would I be able to teach my children everything they need to know to live successful lives (I know I'm talking about success as defined by "the world," but let's face facts-- my children will have to function in the world. And likely every single person reading this post went to a "regular" school, as in not-at-home. So, what do we really know about what kids "need" to learn?).

Again, I never doubted my abilities as a teacher. I learned about many things when I was teaching some topics/books for the first time, and if my plans didn't work the first time (or two or three...), I adapted them.  I tutor for the SAT, ACT, and GRE on the side now, and don't have any hesitation about doing Geometry, Algebra, or any Writing/Reading, so what is it that I'm really fearing? Failing my kids somehow? Sending them off to college only to find out they know NOTHING useful?

* What do our children need to learn? And is dissection one of those things? :-)

3) How will we pay for college? The plan when M and I married was that I would teach high school English again, or possibly lecture at a junior college, once our youngest child started school. In truth, it's what I really wanted-- I loved teaching high school English and I really enjoyed teaching a University composition course. I looked forward to the day that, with all of my children off to school, I would jump back into teaching and still have shorter hours and summertime off, to be there for my kids. I know every family has its own plan for college savings, but if we continue forward with the intent of paying for our children's tuition so they aren't required to have a job in college or build up debt (we were fortunate enough to have no debt from school, thanks to our parents and scholarships), would I be putting too much of a financial burden on my husband if I potentially want to "change the game plan" and stay at home?

College is still 16 years away. If I expanded my tutoring and taught more test prep classes, "lost income" might not even be an issue. We need to pray more about this issue, and I need not to get so caught up in the whole homeschooling "plan" that I lose M's perspective on things. I need to trust him to help lead this discussion more than I have thus far, as I've tried to sway him to my viewpoint.

* I know finances are a tricky issue to discuss, but I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts on college expenses and changing course from early-marriage plans to now.

4) I'm just lining up to jump off the bridge. Also known as, I'm doing it because everybody else is doing it. I had never considered homeschooling until it seemed to be popping up in conversation (and on blogs) everywhere. Am I wanting to do this because it's "the" thing to do? Am I more afraid of homeschooling or of not homeschooling when it seems like everyone else I know is either doing it, thinking of doing it, or has a close friend/family member who's doing it?

This was one of my reasons for doing this discernment series (or perhaps more aptly named "Discovery Series," since we have 3 years before my daughter will enter Kindergarten if we don't homeschool, so I really just want to get some facts). I need to discern the motives behind my thing about this, and pray to TRULY know what is best for my family; this means not only what is best for my children (present and future), but also what is best for my husband and myself. And, everyone who does homeschool points out that it can be a year-to-year and child-to-child decision that is fully-reversible, in both directions.

*What's causing this upswing in the number of homeschooling families? Do you think the trend will continue, or will the next generation think we were insane to even contemplate this?

5) You get one shot with raising each child-- what if I make a mistake? And what even qualifies as a "mistake?"

That's all I've got there. It's too big of a fear to really put it in words right now. It's that fear that creeps in my head during nighttime feedings and prevents me from falling back to sleep. 

*Does anyone else have this fear? Does everyone else have this fear? How do you control it?

6) So many curricula, so many options. I've been looking at the Mother of Divine Grace School and the Kolbe Academy, in particular. There are so many more to choose from, and they will get their own post later. But... what I keep seeing/hearing is that homeschooling parents draw from a variety of sources, then pick and choose what works for them. But how do you know which sources to choose? And this then goes back to my fear of not teaching everything my kids need to know.

I am definitely over-thinking this... even I recognize that. To go back to my own teaching experience, I didn't just teach what was in a book, or exactly what another teacher was teaching at the time to a similar class of students. And not once have I ever worried that I wasn't teaching the kids exactly what they needed to know, when they needed to know it. I taught in a way that suited me best, using sources I personally enjoyed or felt would be valuable, and in a manner that allowed my students to really learn. In addition to teaching "regular" sophomore English, I also taught a more remedial sophomore course for students who needed help catching up to their peers and I taught a sophomore Honors class. Some texts were the same; some were different. It depended on what each class could handle at the particular time. I need to trust my own judgment and not be afraid to ask for help. 

*If you are currently homeschooling, what curricula do you use? Have you tried different programs? Any thoughts?

7) I loved school. My daughter loves MDO. Would I be depriving my children by teaching them at home? Can you deprive a child of life experiences by keeping them out of a traditional social setting? And what exactly makes up life experiences or a life anyway? Make that "Life," with a capital "L." I'm talking about Life in terms of what we talk about when we talk about "experiencing Life." Is Prom a necessary experience? My husband attended an all-boys middle school and high school. Was he deprived of experiencing Life? I was a cheerleader in high school and loved the feeling of cheering for my school. Will my kids miss out on that school-ownership? C came home yesterday from her first day of Mother's Day Out and was going on and on about her "kids," meaning her new friends in class. I like that she was able to do something apart from me and have some ownership of her day-- how could I incorporate a similar experience into homeschooling? Can I even do that?

My new best friend (ask her-- she'll confirm it), Jen from Conversion Diary, has some great ideas about using homeschooling in conjunction with something resembling a MDO program. Once her life slows down a bit, I think she'll be able to write some more about it on this blog, so I'll just mention it and drop that for now. And I want to find out more about homeschooling groups in our area and talk to homeschooling moms and kids to see how they balance this-- being at home but still being a part of something that is NOT home. I played softball for several years on non-school teams and participated in Girl Scouts through high school, mainly in non-school troops, so I know that a traditional school setting isn't necessary for making memories or friends or just getting involved. I need to do a lot more research here, though.

*Are there any experiences that you think kids need to have? Should have? Homeschooling moms-- help! How do you figure this out? What do your kids think about this issue?

Well, that's all I have for now! More next Wednesday and in the weeks to come! Don't forget-- today is the LAST day for the COOKBOOK GIVEAWAY! And given the fact that NO ONE has taken advantage of the multiple chances to win (check out number of times you can comment and enter- SIX separate chances!), the probability that someone who uses all of the options will win is quite high.

I'm baaaaaack!

Whew! We just returned on Monday after a whirlwind tour of Middle America-- 8 states in all, counting our home state of Texas. M had meetings in Colorado Springs for a couple of days, so the whole family loaded up in our truck and headed northwest through New Mexico. Since M had to be in Iowa the following week for more meetings, we decided to spend a few days and nights in Estes Park, CO and explore Rocky Mountain National Park, then head east with him. The park was spectacular... and 44 degrees on top of the mountains! It was a welcome change from the 100 degree plus heat in Texas.

We then trekked across Nebraska to Iowa, where we were able to visit with some of M's family. The kids and I stayed with a relative for several days while M was in another city for meetings, then we reunited to visit more family before driving home (well, technically to our parents' homes, to pick up the dogs) via Missouri, Kansas, and Oklahoma to Texas.

And let me tell you... if you're still in love after spending 13 straight hours in a vehicle, after already spending 16 days traveling with 2 kids under the age of 3, you're golden.

If you don't believe me, here's the math:

16 days traveling + 2 kids under 3 + 13 hours in a vehicle = GOLDEN
(See... I told you)

All-in-all, we were gone from home for 18 days. I'd had elaborate visions of working on the homeschooling series,  reading for my book study, typing up recipes for my cooking blog, and doing a myriad of other things.

I think I may have been under the influence of mind-altering substances.

 Instead, I found myself without internet the majority of the time (my computer antenna decided to only pick up signal if I was RIGHT NEXT to a wireless source) and far too busy keeping a crawling baby from falling off hotel beds/a toddler from trying to eat dropped snacks off a hotel floor/both of them from waking up or disturbing everyone else. I missed blogging at first, but once I realized that by being fully present on the trip for the kids and M, I was doing the best thing for my family and myself, then the guilt dissolved.

HOWEVER...

Now that my new best friend, Jen from Conversion Diary, mentioned the homeschooling series on her blog, I REALLY have to get back to blogging. I have a TON more thoughts and I have several guest posters I'm working on lining up, so it should give a fuller view of what homeschooling really is, and how it can look different for everyone.

So, give me one more week to wash laundry, get the kids back on some semblance of a schedule, and cook a few meals, then I'll be back on top of things!

PS I have a giveaway coming up next week! Hint: Following this blog will give you one entry... go ahead and FOLLOW now!

Returning soon...

So, my little blogging break has turned into a two week hiatus. Still using the iPhone for all blogging/commenting needs. Sigh. But... I'll be back early next week and will be continuing the Homeschooling series on Wednesday! With a real computer! And likely carpal tunnel syndrome from overuse of my thumbs with the phone.

Homeschooling discernment series: Guest post numero uno- Lauren

I wrote an introduction to Lauren, from Magnify the Lord with Me, in yesterday's blog post. Be sure to read it and get acquainted with the author of today's guest post! 

And now... take it away, LAUREN!!! (The crowd goes wild...) 

Thank you, Lisa, for asking me to share my thoughts on home-schooling!  It is a topic that has been near and dear to my heart over the last few years as the Lord has stretched me (as only He is known to do!) in the area of education.  I taught in Catholic elementary schools for seven years.  We are military, so I experienced three different Catholic schools in two states and various socio-economic backgrounds.  I’ve taught kindergarten, first and third grades, but first grade is my favorite!  We do not have children yet, but are hoping to adopt (very) soon.  Yes- I like to plan ahead! 

In my experience, I found that the longer I taught, the more disillusioned I became with the education system.  I discovered that even within the most Godly and focused school, the child’s experience depended directly upon their teacher and the type of class she had that year.  Previously I found home-schooling to be strange and frightening, but as I began to learn more about the concept, we found that it was the answer to our concerns.

The following are the TOP SEVEN REASONS why home-schooling is for us. 

1. The PURPOSE of Education: As a Christian, the purpose of an education is essentially to get you into Heaven!  Every aspect of our education should be oriented towards helping us to know, love and serve God better.  My first principal understood this and expressed it beautifully to us teachers…ONCE.  I do not think most teachers taught with that in mind.  My second and third schools did not understand this at all. 
   
   In the public school and most private schools, the purpose of an education is to become “successful.”  Schools are performance-driven, not grace-oriented.  They want to train students to do well so that they, too, can enter the rat-race and become consumers with the mentality that  if they work hard enough, they can save themselves.  Ironically, many students reject this form of education because they understand that there is more to life than this.  Public schools and many (most?) private schools do not teach our kids to REBEL against the destructive norms of society.  My husband and I want our kids to be rebels for Jesus! 
   
   One last note on religion in education.  In most private schools, religion has become a subject, not the essence of the school.  In my first school, our principal mandated that religion be the FIRST subject taught, so as to impress upon students (and teachers) the priority and importance of the subject.  When I got married and began teaching at a different Catholic school, I tried to continue in this light.  But when I turned in my schedule to my principal, she informed me that it is the school’s policy to teach MATH first because of its importance.  (I should have walked away right then and there.) 
   
   
2. Education is STATE-CONTROLLED: The majority of private schools receive some sort of funding from the state, often with strings attached.  If strings are not attached when the money is offered initially, it can be later.  A school might think they could stop taking the money if the rules were changed, such as teaching homosexuality is “normal,” yet once a school becomes accustomed to accepting money, it can be very difficult to refuse.  Schools teach the values of modern-day American society rather than the values of the Lord. 
   
   Furthermore, most public and private schools use the same textbooks.  The textbook has become the substitute for a well-trained teacher.  Teachers simply read their directions and lines from the teachers’ manual and the lesson is achieved.  In history, for example, very seldom are outside sources of material introduced.  Special interest groups are well aware of this phenomenon and have high influence into what goes into the books in order to promote their agenda. 
   
   
3. The TYPE of Education: For the past century, progressive thought has dominated our schools.  Based on the philosophy of Rousseau and Kant, progressive educators believe that a child can learn naturally if only the hindrance of society is removed.  Kant actually argued that reason is impotent and objective knowledge can never be truly known.  Books like Dewey’s Democracy and Education and Boyd Bode’s Progressive Education at the Crossroads taught that children are inherently good and will learn if impediments are removed.  They teach information for the sake of information.  Terms such as “child-centered,” “open concept,” and “activity-based” are prevalent in a progressive classroom.  It produces students who are largely ignorant of facts and unable to reason.
   
   We are choosing a Catholic Classical education for our children. Our approach recognizes that children are affected by original sin and should not be allowed to “do as they like.”  Whereas the progressive school focuses on subjects, we will focus on the tools of learning. 
   
   Dorothy Sayers in her essay “The Lost Tools of Learning” writes:

[T]he tools of learning are the same, in any and every subject; and the person who knows how to use them will, at any age, get the mastery of a new subject in half the time and with a quarter of the effort expended by the person who has not the tools at his command. [. . .]

            To close this section, let me end with a quote by the famous Flannery O’Conner:  “My advice to parents is…Anything that William Heard Kilpatrick & John Dewey say to do, don’t do.”

4.     TIME: Essentially, school is a colossal waste of time.  That is not to say that time spent in school is completely wasted, but that the amount of time spent learning and practicing worthwhile skills is dramatically out-of-proportion.  And because of the time spent IN school, there is limited time to learn OUT of school!  This limits time spent with family, friends, religious education, extra-curricular activities, play and so-on.   In addition, students are generally taught to the lowest-common denominator in the classroom.  We will be able to teach our children at whatever level they are at!  We can personally tailor the education to each individual child and help them use their minds to the fullest. 

5.     SOCIALIZATION: Ironically, this is the main reason people are against home-schooling!  But socialization is one of the major reasons why we are choosing to home-school our children!  In schools, students are interacting with twenty to thirty students of the same age for forty hours a week.  With one teacher, kids tend to be the ones settling problems and setting up the social structure.  But kids are not the best teachers of effective communication and problem-solving skills, and so the result is quite often more like Lord of the Flies than Lord of the Rings.  At home, there is not a one-to-thirty ratio of adults to children, but, let’s go crazy and say a two-to-ten ratio.  Children are learning to communicate with those older AND younger than themselves, and are better suited to enter the world with people of all ages. 

6.     SHELTER: Yep!  We WANT to shelter our kids!  We want to introduce topics as each child is developmentally ready according to age, ability, maturity and necessity.  The consumerism and sexuality that are prevalent in schools are not welcome in our home.  So many of my first graders were obsessed (yes, obsessed) with Hannah Montana and would sing her songs and shake their booties on the playground.

7.     Finally, FINANCES: This differs significantly from home to home, but in our home, I was planning to stay home with our children until at least the last one was in college.  Private schools are incredibly expensive, especially for the large family we hope to have.  However, the home-school curriculum we hope to use costs about $1,000 a year PER FAMILY.  Amazing!!

A final thought from my husband: “No-one has more incentive to educate their children well, than their own parents.”  

Thanks again, Lisa, for the opportunity share my thoughts.  I look forward to reading more of your thoughts as well as more from other guest-posts and comments! What a great idea for a series!

Thanks, Lauren! You have great thoughts here, and I especially agree with the issues of sheltering, time, and state-controlled (and tested!) education.

Homeschooling guest post TOMORROW!

I am very excited to have a homeschooling guest post tomorrow from my very dear friend, Lauren, from Magnify the Lord with Me. If you read either of our blogs with any regularity, you'll notice that we're constantly linking back and forth to each other. She thinks I'm funny and a great cook, and I think she's brilliantly gifted in all matters concerning faith and frugality. (And obviously we like each other for other reasons. I realize how one/two-dimensional that sounds...)

Lauren and I met in high school, at junior/senior prom. She was a grade behind me and we didn't know each other (though we found out later we'd actually taken a class together when she was in junior high and I was in high school!) before that. Anyway, her up-do started to become a down-do in the middle of prom, so I took her to the bathroom and re-pinned it all. That's all it took! We've been friends for nearly 15 years now. We attended the same university and then moved in together post-college when we both had teaching jobs in the same city. She taught at a Catholic elementary school and I taught English at a Catholic high school.

We went through a lot of changes over our three years of living together as we both dealt with difficulties in our personal lives. Seeing each other at darker moments allowed for even greater rejoicing when we both met our (then-future) husbands within six months of each other. We got to share in each other's wedding planning and then we got married two weeks apart! Since we've been married, we haven't lived in the same city and have only seen each other five times or so. She's my daughter's Godmother, and I can't picture anyone more perfectly crafted to hold my daughter's soul in her hands.

Lauren married a great man whose own personality provides balance to hers. They are both very faithful Catholics and wonderful people who have looked forward to starting a large family together. Unfortunately, they've had to struggle with infertility and tangled adoption processes (you can read about this on her blog-- Lauren's done a great job of chronicling their journey). But...

In just a few more DAYS they are hoping to adopt their first child, a precious little boy! So, even more than ever, the homeschooling issue is becoming a complete reality for them. Be sure to come back tomorrow and read Lauren's post-- it's GREAT!

Also, if you haven't already, be sure to "follow" Lauren's blog and my own. And we both LOVE comments! I always say that sometimes I feel no one is reading this (except Lauren, my most faithful commenter) and then I hear from real-life friends and blog friends and realize people are out there. So, follow and comment! Give me a reason to put my English degrees and creative writing classes to use!

You'll be hearing more from Lauren in future guest posts about the homeschooling curriculum she's planning to use, and any other topic on which I can get her to post! Also, I think I may have to write later about some of our funny moments from living together. We had quite the time together! (See other real-life friends... if you comment on my blog I write nice things about you...) :-)

Homeschooling discernment series: Next up, Lisa lives in a tree

If for no other reason than THIS article, I feel almost compelled to homeschool, despite any other reservations. I may not sleep for a week after reading it.

I had fully intended to delve into the world of homeschooling, but due to unforeseen occurrences this post is going to be less-than-thorough in the way of homeschooling. As in, not related to homeschooling except tangentially. While I had hoped to spend my free time this week doing some researching and writing, the sick baby, active toddler, and other life circumstances have thrown me a bit of a curveball.

It would be ironic if I ignored my children to write about homeschooling, no?

Thus, I'm linking to the article from the Ruth Institute and going ahead and running a post I'd planned to do next week. It's a cop-out, but I need a momentary break to sort out life. If not, it will be completely chaotic and not the least bit cheerful.

So... onto the other post!

I am going to move my family to a redwood forest and live in a tree.

Not really.

But I'm pretty sure that is what M thinks is coming down the tracks.

It started with the "Greener" Household Cleaning Products Engine. Mmm... Grapefruit-scented Method cleanser makes my days happier.

Then the Eating Locally and Growing More of Our Own Food trains rolled into the station. The second part of that was temporarily postponed by vicious beasts foraging deer and the epic fence project. My tomato plants are finally flowering again, but I have no idea if I'll get more tomatoes out of them after the trauma they sustained. I've barely recovered myself. All other veggie and fruit projects were put on hold until next season.

Next the Homeschooling Express thundered down the tracks. Just as it started to lose steam, it rounded a major bend in the road and regained momentum.

And NOW, after all this railway action, the Cloth Diaper Caboose showed up, unexpectedly. You'll be hearing much more about this one, later. Any excuse to post about poop, I always say.

Yes, M is, I'm afraid, very worried about what ideas I'll be cooking up next. I think he's convinced I'm becoming a tree-hugging, hemp-wearing, tattoo-sporting liberal.

Not much to worry about there.

(Although I will say that I think liberals have highjacked the environment for their own purposes, and as people who espouse pro-life beliefs, conservatives need to stand up and take back a sense of environmental guardianship. This post makes some very valid points for all Christians.)

Anyway, don't worry, husband. I don't think I'll be trying to move our family up into a tree any time soon. Unless it can get really good cell reception and internet service. And if it has flushable toilets.

Homeschooling discernment series: The plan

Do you know how much brain power it takes to think about writing about thinking about thinking about homeschooling?

Even more brain power than you just used trying to understand that question.

However, I'm done with the initial processing and am ready to dive head-first (ouch!) into thinking about... you know...
 

HOMESCHOOLING!

(Sidenote: If anyone's children watch Sid the Science Kid on PBS, know that as I was writing that, I was saying it in Sid's voice-- "I want to know all about... HOMESCHOOLING!")

 

For my little family of four, this isn't currently a pressing matter, given that my oldest will not be entering Kindergarten until 2013. However, I know how quickly time has been flying by with two kids, and if we're lucky enough to add more to the mix, it's definitely not going to move any more slowly.

Here's my plan for the series, in no particular order:

1. Provide links to a number of Catholic/Christian-based homeschooling programs, homeschooling blogs, homeschooling books, and general advice and information about homeschooling.

2. Examine the financial implications of homeschooling, with regard to possible lack of second income and saving for college expenses.

3. Have guest posts from people who are considering homeschooling, people who currently homeschool, kids who are homeschooled, and people who would not homeschool their kids or are against it. I think this might provide a well-rounded view.

4. Compose a list (or chart for Lauren!) of the pros and cons of homeschooling vs. public schooling vs. private schooling, based on everything I learn.

5. Have posts on Wednesdays, and possibly Fridays (for guest posts only, if I have enough to warrant an extra day!). This will all start next week.

To give you an idea of where I'm coming from, here are some reservations I currently have:

- A high school teacher with my experience and education can make, in this area, around $40,000/year. I would not plan to work until all of our children were in Kindergarten, but even if we have more kids, this would likely mean I could make a couple (or several!) hundred thousand dollars to set aside for college education.

- My husband is not totally on-board with this. He's open to considering it, but I know I couldn't do this without his complete support. This is one of the reasons I'm doing this series!

- We have very highly-ranked public schools within minutes of our home. Everyone we know raves about how much their kids love the schools and how much they're learning. Would my children be best (or at least very well)-served there, with religious supplementation at home?

- I don't know how moms get a break, or even go grocery shopping or to doctor's appointments without having all of the children in tow.

- I loved going to school. I learned so much from my different teachers and benefited from learning from a variety of adults. This also helped me immensely as a teacher, knowing what styles of teaching I found most effective. I think it's important that children learn to respect a number of authority figures.

- I have a tendency to procrastinate. Will this hinder me in teaching my children? Will it enable them?

- Who will my children befriend? How will they make friends? Will I make them socially-awkward around their peers?

These are some of the questions and concerns that I need to address. There are so many positives to homeschooling, but I need to make sure that it's the right decision for me and my family.

Dive on in with me!

Homeschooling discernment series

So, I've been pondering and praying about just thinking about homeschooling, and now I think I'm ready to talk about it and write about it. In fact, I'm thinking of doing a (weekly?) series on this discernment process/fact-finding mission. Would anyone be interested in hearing my thoughts?

(Silence)

Bueller? Bueller?

Hmm.

Well, my plan is to continue to do research, compile a list of Catholic/Christian homeschooling blogs, and interview homeschooling mothers.

That's as far as I've gotten for now.

Whew.

However, I feel it necessary to refer you back to THIS post.

Think what you will.

Perhaps I should not homeschool my children

Occasionally I contemplate a desire to homeschool my kids. Then I think about how much college will cost by the time my children are 18 and I reconsider a bit. Plus I'm not incredibly organized (ok, so I'm not organized AT ALL).

And then, there are incidents like what happened just now...

I read about the ustream video of an owl whose eggs are about to hatch, so I went to the site and showed my daughter, C. A few minutes later I glanced at it again and noticed a soft fluffy thing in the box with the owl and excitedly called C over to see the adorable baby that must have hatched.

Oops.

It was a bunny rabbit.

And the owl ate it.

Whole.

I may have just scarred my child for life. Either that, or I'm an amazing homeschooling mother and just taught my daughter about the food chain.

Yeah, that's what I'm going with.