I seriously can't stop laughing

I know this isn't super-new, but it has me struggling not to pee in my pants right now.

OK, I had put up the YouTube link, but just watched it and realized the "questionable" words weren't bleeped out...

So, HERE is the Hulu link. You can also click on the photo to go to the link.

There's a good chance that if I wasn't married to the most handsome man on earth, I might try to convince Michael Bolton to fall in love with me.

When he gets to the "mystical quest to the Isle of Tortuga" part, I can't stop laughing. 

So, what do you think? If you laughed, let me know.    :-)

Ultimate denial: Update

From time to time, when my daughter is at Mother's Day Out and my son is napping, I'll flip on The View because I think it acts as a barometer to the nation's attitude, given that some of the women are ultra-liberal, one or two are moderate, and one is fairly conservative.

Today, though, I was blown away by the irony of something that was said. Once ABC posts today's show, I'll be sure to link it.

Update: here's the link

The women were talking about Oprah's big revelation that she has a half-sister who was put up for adoption by Oprah's mother. The question one woman posed to the group was essentially, "Would you be upset with your mother if she did this?"

Surprisingly, only the more moderate and conservative hosts said that they would want to hear about the whole situation behind the adoption before passing any judgement.

HOWEVER, the two most liberal hosts (Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar) both thought that it was unfair that the mother had denied Oprah a sibling, and denied her the chance to have a relationship with her sister.

(Update: When I watched it again, I realized that it was Sherri Shepherd who brought up the denied relationship with a sibling, but Joy still seems to agree with this)

Seriously??? Do they not see the irony in their statement? Despite being the two most vocal supporters (on The View) of a woman's right to choose abortion, Whoopi and Joy confirmed what the pro-life movement, Pope John Paul II, and Mother Teresa all said: abortion is wrong not only because it kills a child, but also because it deprives current or future children of their sibling.

God, turn our hearts toward You.

Best. Comment. EVER.

Ok, I need to confess something. M and I watched about 10 minutes, give or take, of Skating with the Stars. We thought Castle was going to be on 9, like always... that's "our" show, along with Modern Family (but we can't watch that every week because sometimes C is still awake, or M is still driving home).

Anyway, I wanted to keep the skating show on for a few minutes so I could see who was skating.

And so I could practice my own (rudimentary) skating moves on the Oriental rug. I'm not ashamed. I totally did some of those leg-extension spins and some straight leg gliding. The rug is great because it has very low friction. This took me back to when I was watching the Olympics this year, and practicing my moves once the kids went to bed. But I digress...

Back to my story now.


I went to the Entertainment Weekly website to see how the celebrity (mostly of a non-celebrated-caliber of celebrity, actually) skaters did, and what the overall perception of the show was. I skimmed through the comments, and came across this gem:

I was looking forward to it, but had to turn it off after my family wouldn’t stop laughing at “all those ugly people”. My neighbours also got quite annoyed (probably because they are hideous) and started hurling abuse at us. Hey, it’s not our fault you all look like beavers. If you are reading this Julie Edwards I hope you feel ashamed because now my daughter knows 2 more swear words. And don’t worry hun we are leaving the apartments soon so we don’t have to deal with trash like you.

Seriously? Best. Comment. EVER.


P.S. I couldn't resist linking to past skating, rug, and Olympic posts. Who knew I wrote about that stuff enough to link it?


P.P.S. I should have given the credit for that above comment to "Sue." Thank you, Sue, for that wonderfully random gem of a rant about your neighbors. It was terrible, but I laughed anyway. I have to say I feel somewhat sorry for the "Julie Edwards" family now, wherever they may be.

7 Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 9)

1. This will likely get a post unto itself at some point, but if you smell dog mess, even if you can't see it, NEVER assume that it's a dog toot. You WILL step in it. With BOTH feet. On the 100% wool authentic ORIENTAL RUG.

2. I'm always surprised by the anti-Catholic hatred that is spewed around the time of papal visits. In this case, our Pope is in the UK now. Their newspaper comment sections are filled with absolute disgust for this man, and for our faith in general. I honestly can't comprehend the hatred of the Church and one of her servants.

3. My brother-in-law just clued us in to Arrested Development, which we're able to watch on our streaming Netflix. It's soooo funny! It's been a nice kids-are-in-bed-and-we-can-snuggle show to watch. Since it only lasts about 22 minutes, we can watch one or two easily without staying up too late.

4. This probably should have been #1, but... LAUREN AND HER HUSBAND HAVE A BABY! Welcome, Abigail Chiara! We all love you, precious girl! Please continue to pray for this new family and the birth family.

5. Cloth diapering has, thus far, gone pretty well. H was soaking last night, though, at a 1 am feeding. I'm not sure what happened. The thing I have to remind myself when I get discouraged by leaks, is that they used to happen with disposable diapers, too. They've rarely happened with cloth diapers at night when I have a hemp insert in there with the regular insert, though, so I really have no idea what went wrong... it didn't even seem very soaked in the diaper itself! Maybe I didn't do a good job adjusting it just right???

6. While I would rather have been outside with my family under more pleasant circumstances, I had a great time last night on the driveway, washing the Oriental rug (see #1). I pressure-washed the driveway and garage, laid the rug on the driveway, shampooed the rug with Woolite and rinsed it, then laid it on the clean garage floor to dry. M finished building the gate for our fence (he's so handy, that husband of mine! He built an entire fence himself for our huge yard... 2/3 of an acre!), C skipped up and down the driveway, and H sat in his highchair and ate. It was fun to all be outside together, even if it meant the kids were up later than I would have liked.

7. I foresee a busy, outdoor weekend as we try to restore order to our backyard after havoc wreaked by the torrential rain and the broken water main (oh yes... adding insult to injury) that re-flooded our backyard. On a happy note, my tomatoes are finally turning red, and I even have a few new (very small) green ones on the bush. I may have enough for all of us to eat 1 pizza. Drat those deer!

7 Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 3)

1. Forget all about how amazing I thought Prednisone was. Yes, it's helped my ulcerative colitis flare. Yes, I had amazing energy for a while. BUT... I woke up yesterday feeling as if my knees were being crushed by a giant. I fell all over the house and could barely walk, as I'm being weaned off the meds. I can't wait to get back to normal (and for my puffy face to get back to normal!). I'd rather have less energy but more physical ability any day!

2. What would I do without my parents and in-laws? I am so blessed that they are able to help out. Mom showed up last night to help watch C while I take H with me to the doctor (for the whole Prednisone side-effect thing).

3. Double ear infection= no fun for Mommy or C. She's pushed every limit possible the last few days and has developed quite the daredevil nature... standing on EVERY chair/bed in the house and then cracking up. She's become well-acquainted with time-outs the past couple of days.

4. Thomas the Tank Engine is awesome. Especially when it comes to entertaining a 2-year-old. Especially when Mommy can barely walk. We watched LOTS of Thomas yesterday. And I don't feel the slightest bit guilty.

5. I always forget how good a fresh pear tastes. Why don't I buy them more often?

6. I love my new Petunia Pickle Bottom bag. It makes me happy. Thanks, Mom and Dad!

7. I'm enjoying working on the blog early in the morning while the kids are still in bed. It's nice to have something just for me.

7 Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 2)

1. I am a proud iPhone owner! M has one, too, but he's incredibly jealous (seriously!) of my cool case. It's pink and black and cute all over! I didn't really see the need for me to own one of these at first, but wow... it's already worth it's weight in gold now (which I suppose is actually not a lot, since it's pretty light). C is tech-savvy and can already operate it-- flicking through pages and pics like a pro. It's ridiculous. I'm still trying to get used to the keypad, and she figured out how to turn the silly thing on and off.

2. I can't wait to get this stamp on August 26th:

Reading this blog post by Patrick Madrid is also well-worth your time-- it talks about the furor over this particular stamp being issued by the Postal Service.

3. Following that last note, stamps make me happy! Maybe it's because I'm the daughter of a postal employee, but I've always loved cute stamps. Mom and Dad occasionally still send me some stamps, which just makes my entire week. I recently bought some Simpsons stamps and some kelp forest stamps. They even make my bills look cuter. I buy the boring Forever stamps, too, but seriously-- it's not like I'm going to stock up on those because I'm pretty sure my money is making WAY more in the bank or savings account than in my letter drawer. I heard from the local postmaster that someone bought $1,000+ of forever stamps because he wanted to beat the system. Methinks that guy needs to rethink his own system...

4. "Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody."

Farewell to J.D. Salinger, whose Catcher in the Rye I somehow managed not to read until last year. How did I miss this book?? It's part of pop culture just as much as it is fine literature! Annie Hall, Jerry Maguire, The Good Girl, Billy Joel, the Jonas Brothers, Rick Springfield, and Spandau Ballet (among many, many others) all reference that work.

I'm linking a video that reminds me of why I love teaching-- I love to get students invested in the stories of the authors and the times that books were written, like Craig Ferguson does here.

5. Bring on the Olympics! I've been pleasantly surprised to discover that my hubby loves the Winter Olympics, especially (wait for it...) ICE SKATING! C skates around the living room and does little jumps and spins, so this will be fun. Yay for our TV! Yay for the Olympics!

6. Again about TV... loving the fact that we can watch Netflix movies/TV via the PS3 on our TV. M and I finished Season 3 of Dexter and now we've started back at Season 1 to see everything we missed. C likes to watch Thomas and Friends and I've found other cute shows (The Muppets, Bob the Builder, Dora the Explorer, etc) that I can turn on no matter what time it is, TV show-wise. Since we don't have cable, it's been nice to expose her to more learning shows besides the morning PBS ones (she often is still asleep for Sesame Street!).

7. M makes the best White Russian drinks ever. That's all I have on that. Mmmm.

7 Quick Takes Friday (Vol. 1)

1. So, my brother-in-law lent us Season 3 of the Showtime TV series "Dexter." It's CREEPY. And even though M and I can't figure out if we like it (um, crazy psychopathic guy kills bad people in scary, crazy, and creepy ways... see why we aren't sure what we think?), we're oddly addicted. Particularly me, because I just want to get to the bottom of the season's mysteries. Creepy mysteries.

2. I'm teaching C how to count to ten in French. She already does it in English and is learning it in Spanish, so I figure ma petite fille needs to speak MY favorite foreign language. Plus, she's been to Quebec, but never Mexico, so French has already been far more practical. "Huit" (eight) is her favorite number, so she sometimes shouts it out randomly in the car. It sounds like she's screaming for "wheat."

3. M and I have TV as of this week! C is loving Sesame Street and Thomas and Friends, which I am totally ok with. It's nice to have a few minutes to get myself ready while she's learning something. Abby Cadabby is now almost as near-and-dear to her as Tinkerbell. Plus, now we can watch 24 and Modern Family (best comedy ensemble on TV EVER).

4. When I was in junior high, I used to make fun of moms who had their children attached to kid-leashes. Now, I totally get it. Velcro-ing C to my leg may also be an option when I'm trying to wrangle her and the stroller around in public places. Time for a double stroller!

5. I want one of these:

It's a Bugatti Veyron Mouse, and I think it looks like fun. And it's an affordable $1.5 million. Perhaps I'll just attach ears, a tail, and whiskers to the Ford F150.

6. Scrapblog is fun. I'm working on making a few pages for a scrapbook. Anyone want to take bets as to whether I can make even ONE album without abandoning it like I did blogging??

7. I have found that I like to clean now. Maybe it's the Prednisone I'm taking for the colitis, but I'm like Superwoman around the house these days. Whoo-hoo for crazy steroid-driven energy!