2) The desire to live another's blog-life, to have her readership, to take pictures like her, etc.
3) The overwhelming desire to redesign one's own blog after seeing another's blog.
(Derivatives) Blenvious.
I coined this word (fun SAT word... neologism. It means a newly-coined word. Thank you for your patience. The English teacher will now sit down) back in 2006 when I first started reading friends' blogs. A quick Google search today revealed that some other people are using it, too, though. I'm going to pretend that I was the first person to think of it/use it in context/use it in conversation. I feel like Shakespeare now.
Pardon me while I adjust my frilly collar.
The thing about blogging is that while there is a presumption of honesty associated with it, it can be whitewashed to either present the blogger in a better light or to avoid the unpleasant truth. I think we're all a bit guilty of this. I have to laugh sometimes when I'm reading a real-life friend's blog and see either a dramatically revised history or complete omission of truth.
I can picture all of my friend's wondering... is Lisa talking about ME here? Don't worry guys. I'm not going to call out anyone publicly, lest I've misrepresented myself on here! Plus, I'm certainly not writing this maliciously (I happen to like my friends!), but rather to muse on this phenomenon of only seeing what the blogger chooses to present.
Knowing what I do know, though, about the actual facts that have been amended or omitted makes me realize that there's no point in feeling blenvious about the lives of those I only know from their blogs.
The woman with the hilariously witty commentary might use biting words with her husband and children. The woman with the fabulous photos might not make her husband's breakfast, lunch, and dinner everyday, instead telling him to buy it himself. The woman whose spiritual life I admire so much might presently have her own demons to battle and a past she'd rather forget. The woman with the perfectly organized and decorated house might be having marital issues or health problems.
Or maybe she just does like I do and cleans the one spot she's using as a background in her picture...
Wishing for someone else's life is futile, because 1) it just ain't gonna happen and 2) there's a good chance that one's own life is just as exciting and wonderful as other people's real lives. So, in a note to myself as much as everyone else, stop being blenvious, kiss your family extra today, and enjoy the wonderful gifts and life you have!
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Now I love YOUR new signerature!!!
ReplyDeleteI read once to never compare your internals to another's externals. You know yourself- your faults, failures, worries and concerns intimately. But you only see what other people want to reveal.
So never compare your internals to another's externals.
Good advice that I've held with me!
That's a great rule to live by! It's soooo easy with blogging to look at (for instance) Sarah over at Clover Lane and wish that I was that organized and such a talented photographer! Or how creative and artsy Kate is, and how fun it is that she lives within minutes of museums and the zoo. And then I partly want that life, even though mine is wonderful here.
ReplyDeleteGood post, Lisa. And great advice, Lauren! I have a trick... when some blogs are really making me feel insecure, I use the "unsubscribe" button. Very simple. :)
ReplyDelete