Not hiding, just remodeling

I've been pretty absent from blogging recently, though I manage at least to read many blogs and comment here and there, mostly using my trusty iPhone while hiding from the kids and peeing in private taking a break from my daily business. It's been pretty crazy around here lately.

So, what's been keeping you so busy, Lisa?

Thanks for asking, imaginary friend!

On CHRISTMAS DAY, a day when most people sit around the fireplace while sipping egg nog as puppies in sweaters frolic at their feet and children squeal with delight at their new pajamas (seriously, that needs a post of its own later) toys, M and I decided to start our kitchen renovation project. We're replacing our Formica countertops with granite tile countertops and are doing all of it ourselves... even the bullnosing of the edges.

Nothing says "Merry Christmas!" like tearing apart your countertops and still having to cook meals in there. (For the record, we don't eat out. Ever. The last time I can remember our little family eating out was in April.) What can I say-- I love to cook and can do it 10 times better than anywhere else we could go. I'd be embarrassed about bragging, but if you'd been here for the party we threw a few weeks ago (the weekend before the renovation), you'd know that I'm no liar. Grilled pork loin, tortilla soup, homemade French bread, party salad (that's what I call it... no idea what it's really called), potato salad, chocolate cake, margaritas, and tons of appetizers and dips... but I digress.

Anyway, here's a sneak peek from one side of last week's progress:

Obviously they're not grouted yet, and at this point we hadn't finished the very back, along the wall.

This is one of the (very annoying, very frustrating) jobs that I had: matching tiles together so that the entire counter will look as seamless as possible:

It's like some crazy version of calculus on the back of some of the tile. This is why my husband keeps me around-- I'm useful. And, I'm the only one who understands my code, so he can't get rid of me. That's also why I handle the bills and filing system. He'd be dazed and confused without me. :)

Giving credence to dreams

I've sat on this story for quite some time. You know how you sometimes have good news that you really want to share, but you don't know 100% if you should share it or not, because there's a chance that nothing might come of it?

What? You have no idea what I'm talking about? And you found that last sentence to be horribly convoluted and confusing? Hmm.
 
I've had a couple of dreams in my life that have "come true" in real life-- I put that in quotation marks because coming true didn't happen exactly like I'd dreamed, but the dream ended up playing a big role in real life.

My dear friend Lauren blogged about one of these dreams and how it influenced her husband's and her emotional and spiritual commitment to two precious babies that they were unable to physically parent.

Another time, as Lauren anxiously awaited the birth of her sweet daughter, I sent her an e-mail in the middle of the night, just two days before her daughter was born.

I just had a dream that your baby girl was born and you named her Abigail (Joy/Father's Joy) Marie (ok, that means bitter... maybe bitter joy after losing the other children??) _______. If that IS the name, I'm going to try to induce a dream, go back to sleep, then wake up and buy a lottery ticket.

Love,
L

She and her husband hadn't considered the name "Abigail" before, but as her husband wrote in his blog, it was the perfect name for a much-longed-for child who brought such joy to her father-- and mother!

In both of these instances, the dream served as a catalyst, but real life was not an exact replica of the dream.

Ok, so now that you know the background of a couple of my dreams that have been (somewhat) actualized in real life (though for the record, I have yet to be chased around a wood pile by the Big Bad Wolf, forced to run from flying monkeys, lost all of my teeth, or shown up for a final exam after skipping every single class), here's the dream that is on my mind now.

And it has been recurring for several months. Vividly.

Through Lauren's struggles with infertility, I've gotten to "know" several infertile/sub-fertile Catholic women who blog, and I pray for all of them regularly. One woman, however, has taken over many of my dreams.

Several months ago, I first dreamed about meeting this woman. The scenario was quite believable (aside from the fact that she introduced herself by her blog name!) and in my dream I thought, "Wow! I feel like I already know her. And I have a feeling her life is going to change soon." Just then, she turned around and I saw her very pregnant belly. In my dream (and every one of these dreams since) it was Christmastime, so in real life this past Christmas season I was holding my breath and checking her blog regularly to see if she had any big announcements.

I can't write more about this particular blogger without likely giving away who she is (I don't want to do this for fear of disappointing her), but if she reads this, all I can say is not to lose hope! All of us need to cling to hope, and I have such faith that, in whatever way God plans, this dream of mine will be realized in her life. I feel very called to put this out there, because I think she needs to believe.

Whew. Weight off my chest. :-)

Thoughts on being single

A blogger who I enjoy following (Shannon at A Friend of Gianna) has written recently about being separated (physically) from someone very special to her, for several months. I was thinking about this over the weekend and remembering how long waiting once seemed (now it seems my life is moving far too quickly as my kids grow up) when I was single. I thought about sending her an e-mail, but wanted to hear other thoughts on being single. I wish I could go back and give my single-self some advice about how to make the most of the time before marriage and children, but since I can't do that, I can lay out my thoughts for Shannon. The irony of it all is that, while she currently thinks that there is a long time before she gets to see her beau, if she plans to do any or all of my suggestions, she will likely panic and think, "I don't have enough time to do this!" It's all about perspective. :)

My advice on being single:

Learn new things, and get good at them

Make a goal of trying one new recipe a week. Ask friends for their favorite recipes, look online, and check out different cookbooks from your local library. Sign up for cooking classes and then practice, practice, practice. It's easy to get into a cooking rut once your husband and kids have favorite meals that you know will always turn out great. It's more difficult to experiment because if things don't turn out like you'd hoped, you may end up making two meals in one night.

Take up a new hobby and take classes for it. Want to learn Italian? Sign up at a local junior college or find a native speaker willing to give you lessons. Take piano lessons or sewing classes. Learn how to decorate cakes in a Wilton course or take a painting class from a local artist. Find a guy friend who will let you practice cutting his hair... there are plenty of videos on YouTube about how to do this (or find a hairdresser who will teach you), and it will be an invaluable skill once you're married.

Develop really practical skills not generally associated with females, like basic woodworking, basic auto repair, and self-defense. Go to a firing range and learn to shoot. Have your father, brother, or male friend (or me... I learned while in grad school when my husband was commuting 2 hours each way to work!) teach you how to grill a mean steak on a charcoal grill. Go fishing or camping and bait your own hook or set up your own tent.

Discover your city

Grab a friend and visit different restaurants around town. Ask the waiters what's good and then order those things. Then, when you have a date night at some point down the road, you have several restaurant options and different dishes to suggest.

Visit museums that you wouldn't normally think you'd like. Not really into modern art? Take a guided tour. Don't know much about the history of airplanes or cowgirls or American Indians? Read up on the museum and then go there with an open mind.

Once a month or every other month, do something big-- go to a concert, the ballet, the opera, or an outdoor festival. Appreciate how in this season of your life, you can do things like this without a lot of babysitter planning or agreement from a spouse!

Get healthy

This will be the easiest time in your life to get in shape, inside and out. Start/continue a workout plan. Scheduling workouts around kids' naptimes and your spouse's home improvement projects takes planning to a new level.

Join some sort of team: volleyball, kickball, running club, table tennis... it doesn't matter. Just connect with others who enjoy the same sport.

Eat locally and organically, at least in part. Buy five different kinds of apples and see which you like best. Visit farmer's markets to see what's being grown in season, and try to buy only those kinds of veggies and fruits at the grocery store.

Get eye exams, physicals, and dental cleanings regularly. Do self breast exams monthly. Floss. Take a multivitamin and drink lots of water. Again, once kids are in the picture, going to a doctor or dentist takes some major planning. Get a good haircut and use a good shampoo. Don't forget to moisturize and wear sunscreen!

Learn about yourself, and adjust accordingly

If you are always running late, make it a point to allow extra time to leave and get somewhere. If you procrastinate, set goals and reward yourself for achieving them on-time. If you have trouble staying organized, make some new habits that will help you to get better. Forming new (read: better) habits is so much easier when you're the only one having to adapt to the change!

Save, save, save your money! It's tempting to think that this is the only time your money will be all yours, but really, it already belongs to you and your future spouse. I wish I'd saved more (and bought fewer shoes and frivolous things) so that I would have entered our marriage with a larger nest egg. If you don't currently budget, start now. Learn about money, because there is a 50-50 chance that you'll be the one handling the family finances.

Read new books. Learn more about your faith. Subscribe to a newspaper or magazine that presents a world view (as in, what is going on in the entire world). If you have the chance to travel, do it! Find a few cities you really like and go there at least once or twice a year. Find favorite places to eat and stay there, and consider them "your" places.

Okay, fellow bloggers... what other advice would you give to your single or pre-children self?

Prayer Buddy revelation...

And the moment you've all been waiting for... ok, so the moment that I've been waiting for...

I've spent Advent praying for POLKADOT of Making God Laugh! Some amazing things have come out of this on my end, so I can't wait to blog about that... next week.

I have to shower, get dressed, stuff a 1 year old in a vest and pant set and toss a 3 year old into a fancy dress in the next 30 minutes. Pray for me!

Polkadot, I was honored to pray for you this Advent.

Letter #4 to my Prayer Buddy

Dear Prayer Buddy,

Well, I guess this will be my final formal message to you, pre-Christmas. I'm hoping to take a nice blogging break while my handsome husband is home with me and the kids!

Constant prayer on your behalf has been one of the biggest blessings in my recent life. I've mentioned this before, but by directing my prayers toward someone else and leaving my own intentions in the hands of the Buddy praying for me, I've been experiencing an outpouring of grace. The thing that I've realized is that even after this season is over, I will continue to pray for you, weep with you, and rejoice over the blessings in your life.

This week's theme is Love, and I can't think of anything more fitting to pray that you feel than love. Love, no matter what is happening or not happening in your life. Love, no matter the circumstances. Love that merely IS.  Love, a constant presence in your life that will continue to expand as someday your own family will hopefully expand. My rosaries this week have been a great time to reflect on the Perfect Love that comes to us in the form of a tiny, helpless child who had to surrender his life to the care of a frightened young woman, trusting that His Father knew best how to use Him and His suffering, and use her and her suffering. I pray that you will know this same loving surrender as Christmas approaches.

With love,

Lisa

Advent miracle #2!

Wow... my prayer buddy (praying for me) appears to have a direct line to God. If you know who she is, I suggest that you direct all of your prayer requests to her.

Although another friend and I are also being prayer buddies this season, so maybe I should split the credit for this miraculous event...

Anyway, no matter who deserves the credit, here's the miracle I'm discussing:

I was having a very busy, stressful, and overall frustrating day. Kids who wouldn't nap, errands that were only half-completed, a one-year-old who refused all food, a three-year-old who argued with everything, and several other complications to my day in general, including a terrible 12-hour headache that triumphed over the best medications/water/food/exercise that I could throw at it.

At the end of the day, all I wanted was to go to bed and hope the next day would not be miserable. However, M suggested that I take a nice bath after the kids were in bed. WOW-- novel idea for me! I have probably only taken 10 baths in the past 4+ years since I've been married/been a mom. I don't find them as relaxing as I used to, since I'm typically interrupted by a hungry baby, upset toddler, or talkative spouse. But, M promised to leave me in peace so I could read a magazine and soak.

Ahhhh!

My favorite thing to do is read a "fluff" book or magazine in the bath. Something that doesn't require any much brainpower. I didn't have any books that fit the bill in my room, and I'd already read Parents, Southern Living, and National Geographic for the month (not that the last one is a fluffy magazine at all). All I had was the latest Economist, which I love but thought was a bit too heavy for the tub.

 I resigned myself to The Economist, still wishing I had something else to read, and ran the water.

 The magazine we got in the mail that day

 I was surprised to see that JCPenney was now advertising in The Economist

 WHAT? Advent miracle! The outside cover was The Economist, but the inside was People! Fluff magazine extraordinaire! 

The headache was gone within the next 10 minutes of soaking and soaking in useless celebrity news.

Magazine giveaway WINNER!

Congrats to Kaitlin at More Like Mary~More Like Me for winning a one-year subscription to Southern Living!

In lieu of coming up with a brilliantly creative method of choosing a winner, I went with Math Goodies' Custom Number Generator. Number 8 was the lucky number!

I LOVED reading everyone's comments and wanted to respond to all of them, but then I would have had to recount every entry and ignore mine and at that point the math went right over my head once I realized my coconut macaroons were starting to get too toasty and the kids wanted immediate attention, all at the same time.

Sooo... now I can respond!

Kristin-- Glad you entered, and I'm was so excited to know someone has me on Google Reader. It made my day. I have a bunch of butterfly-attracting wildflowers that I'm hoping will come up in the spring next year.

That Married Couple-- Magnolia trees count in my book! I think their flowers are gorgeous.

Faith makes things possible-- Grow the herbs-- it's so easy and you can winter them inside. My basil is growing above my sink now, and we have a ton of rosemary outside (it grows basically wild where I live).

Joy Beyond the Cross-- If I had been choosing a winner on sweetness, your comment would have done it! Hope you survived the snow. And gerbera daisies grow well here in Texas in early Spring, so they'd probably be great in MN for half the year. :)

Mary-- Please grow tulips! I've never tried and don't think I could manage them where we live, but I'd love to know that someone out there is doing it!

Lauren-- Awww... I love "our" prom meeting story! I've done well with white azaleas, but my pink ones always bloom once and then die.

Kate-- Go with a sago palm or yucca. Those are easy to grow and ignore. Or a plumeria-- its flowers smell delicious and it isn't too tough to keep alive.

Kaitlin-- Maybe you've never grown a flower, but this magazine will guilt you into doing so! The gardens are to-die-for.

NC Sue-- I love orchids and have two in our winter greenhouse now. This is my first year to put them in there (as opposed to keeping them in our house year-round, so I'm a bit nervous). They're so elegant!

Joanna-- You need to grow flowers! Teach your boys about pretty things. :) Try a plumeria this spring/summer. If I have extra cuttings I'll give you one. That will ensure that we see each other SOONER than later!!

Ann-- I'm growing my first amaryllis this year! I bought a bulb kit from Home Depot for $5 and it's already started to grow. I'm hoping it will bloom by Christmas. Thus far it has been the easiest flower in the world.

Annie-- When M and I left College Station, I was so sad to leave behind all of my irises. The worst part was when we drove back by our old house and I saw how the new owners had let them get completely choked by weeds. I tried to convince M to let me jump out of the car and dig up all of my bulbs then and there.

NOTE: Tomorrow I'll be posting about the second Advent miracle of the season!