Lisa's Top Homeschooling Fears:
1) I won't be able to cut it. Not in an academic-sense, but in terms of
my personality. I'm afraid I'll get lazy, fall behind, ruin my children's lives, etc. I can have my house cleaned (nearly) perfectly and then, just two days later, have it look like a tornado hit. I can procrastinate with the best of them and I'm fearful that not only would I pass on poor time-management skills to my children, but they would never have a chance to learn better ones from other teachers.
This, however, didn't worry me when I taught high school. I knew what had to be done in terms of assignments and deadlines, and I did it. Also, whether or not I teach the kids their regular schooling at home or not, it's still up to me and M to help them to be more organized, conscientious people. Plus, would a job outside the home PLUS a family really make me get in gear? I doubt it. This is another area I see that I need to improve in now, before C reaches Kindergarten age... I need to prove to myself that I can organize our lives better and create more peace at home.
* Any other non-Type-A moms out there with thoughts on this? If I were
Type-A, this would be a no-brainer, in terms of whether or not I could keep our home and school lives organized.
2) I won't be able to cut it. This time from an academic perspective. What about dissection? And is dissection even necessary? Who decides what's necessary? Would I be able to teach my children everything they need to know to live successful lives (I know I'm talking about success as defined by "the world," but let's face facts-- my children will have to function in the world. And likely every single person reading this post went to a "regular" school, as in not-at-home. So, what do we really know about what kids "need" to learn?).
Again, I never doubted my abilities as a teacher. I learned about many things when I was teaching some topics/books for the first time, and if my plans didn't work the first time (or two or three...), I adapted them. I tutor for the SAT, ACT, and GRE on the side now, and don't have any hesitation about doing Geometry, Algebra, or any Writing/Reading, so what is it that I'm really fearing? Failing my kids somehow? Sending them off to college only to find out they know NOTHING useful?
* What do
our children need
to learn? And is dissection one of those things? :-)
3) How will we pay for college? The plan when M and I married was that I would teach high school English again, or possibly lecture at a junior college, once our youngest child started school. In truth, it's what I really wanted-- I
loved teaching high school English and I really enjoyed teaching a University composition course. I looked forward to the day that, with all of my children off to school, I would jump back into teaching and still have shorter hours and summertime off, to be there for my kids. I know every family has its own plan for college savings, but if we continue forward with the intent of paying for our children's tuition so they aren't required to have a job in college or build up debt (we were fortunate enough to have no debt from school, thanks to our parents and scholarships), would I be putting too much of a financial burden on my husband if I potentially want to "change the game plan" and stay at home?
College is still 16 years away. If I expanded my tutoring and taught more test prep classes, "lost income" might not even be an issue. We need to pray more about this issue, and I need not to get so caught up in the whole homeschooling "plan" that I lose M's perspective on things. I need to trust him to help lead this discussion more than I have thus far, as I've tried to sway him to my viewpoint.
* I know finances are a tricky issue to discuss, but I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts on college expenses and changing course from early-marriage plans to now.
4) I'm just lining up to jump off the bridge. Also known as, I'm doing it because everybody else is doing it. I had never considered homeschooling until it seemed to be popping up in conversation (and on blogs) everywhere. Am I wanting to do this because it's "the" thing to do? Am I more afraid of homeschooling or of
not homeschooling when it seems like everyone else I know is either doing it, thinking of doing it, or has a close friend/family member who's doing it?
This was one of my reasons for doing this discernment series (or perhaps more aptly named "Discovery Series," since we have 3 years before my daughter will enter Kindergarten if we don't homeschool, so I really just want to get some facts). I need to discern the motives behind my thing about this, and pray to TRULY know what is best for my family; this means not only what is best for my children (present and future), but also what is best for my husband and myself. And, everyone who does
homeschool points out that it can be a year-to-year and child-to-child decision that is fully-reversible, in both directions.
*What's causing this upswing in the number of homeschooling families? Do you think the trend will continue, or will the next generation think we were insane to even contemplate this?
5) You get one shot with raising each child-- what if I make a mistake? And what even qualifies as a "mistake?"
That's all I've got there. It's too big of a fear to really put it in words right now. It's that fear that creeps in my head during nighttime feedings and prevents me from falling back to sleep.
*Does anyone else have this fear? Does everyone
else have this fear? How do you control it?
6) So many curricula, so many options. I've been looking at the
Mother of Divine Grace School and the
Kolbe Academy, in particular. There are so many more to choose from, and they will get their own post later. But... what I keep seeing/hearing is that homeschooling parents draw from a variety of sources, then pick and choose what works for them. But how do you know which sources to choose? And this then goes back to my fear of not teaching everything my kids need to know.
I am definitely over-thinking this... even I recognize that. To go back to my own teaching experience, I didn't just teach what was in a book, or exactly what another teacher was teaching at the time to a similar class of students. And not once have I ever worried that I wasn't teaching the kids exactly what they needed to know, when they needed to know it. I taught in a way that suited me best, using sources I personally enjoyed or felt would be valuable, and in a manner that allowed my students to really learn. In addition to teaching "regular" sophomore English, I also taught a more remedial sophomore course for students who needed help catching up to their peers and
I taught a sophomore Honors class. Some texts were the same; some were different. It depended on what each class could handle at the particular time. I need to trust my own judgment and not be afraid to ask for help.
*If you are currently homeschooling, what curricula do you use? Have you tried different programs? Any thoughts?
7) I loved school. My daughter loves MDO. Would I be depriving my children by teaching them at home? Can you deprive a child of life experiences by keeping them out of a traditional social setting? And what exactly makes up
life experiences or a
life anyway? Make that "Life," with a capital "L." I'm talking about Life in terms of what we talk about when we talk about "experiencing Life." Is Prom a necessary experience? My husband attended an all-boys middle school and high school. Was he deprived of experiencing Life? I was a cheerleader in high school and loved the feeling of cheering for
my school. Will my kids miss out on that school-ownership? C came home yesterday from her first day of Mother's Day Out and was going on and on about her "kids," meaning her new friends in class. I like that she was able to do something apart from me and have some ownership of her day-- how could I incorporate a similar experience into homeschooling?
Can I even do that?
My new best friend (ask her-- she'll confirm it), Jen from Conversion Diary, has some great ideas about using homeschooling in conjunction with something resembling a MDO program. Once her life slows down a bit, I think she'll be able to write some more about it on this blog, so I'll just mention it and drop that for now. And I want to find out more about homeschooling groups in our area and talk to homeschooling moms and kids to see how they balance this-- being at home but still being a part of something that is NOT home. I played softball for several years on non-school teams and participated in Girl Scouts through high school, mainly in non-school troops, so I know that a traditional school setting isn't necessary for making memories or friends or just getting involved. I need to do a lot more research here, though.
*Are there any experiences that you think kids need
to have? Should
have? Homeschooling moms-- help! How do you figure this out? What do your kids think about this issue?
Well, that's all I have for now! More next Wednesday and in the weeks to come! Don't forget-- today is the LAST day for the
COOKBOOK GIVEAWAY!
And given the fact that NO ONE has taken advantage of the multiple chances to win (check out number of times you can comment and enter- SIX separate chances!), the probability that someone who uses all of the options will win is quite high.
