Oh, deer!

Two-and-a-half years.

That's how long it took me to plant a potted flower garden that makes my backyard feel like the tropics.

One night.

That's how long it took for the deer to dismantle it.

Geraniums. Begonias. Red Sister Cordylines (Ti plants). Plumerias. Agaves. Coleus. Rose of Sharon. Moss Roses. Gardenias. Tomato plants. Tomatoes on tomato plants. My red Hibiscus.

NO! NOT YOUR RED HIBISCUS!

I know. I feel the same way. You should never come between a woman and her red hibiscus. Or her red high heels. Or her red lipstick. But ESPECIALLY her red hibiscus.

If the deer weren't so dang cute, I'd post a sign that "All Intruders Will Be Shot On Sight" and then sit outside all night with my daughter's pink Daisy BB gun across my lap.

The deer would get the message.

Note to my husband: Dear Love-of-my-life, the next time you take down the fence without adequately protecting my plants, you will be sleeping outside and guarding them yourself. Love, Your Wife.